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Drop The Spear

Some days, I wish I was King David instead of King Saul.

I think one of the biggest problems our society has is how we like to complain so much.

I think one of the biggest problems I have is that I complain too much.

Let me tell you this, just because things aren’t going your way, doesn’t mean God is being unfair to you.

Honestly, that’s very hypocritical of me to say that, because just last Sunday, I persisted with my way, instead of God’s way.

Have you ever been in a situation when everything that could go wrong, went wrong?

Last Sunday, we had our usual youth service. Except it wasn’t so usual. Every possible thing that could go wrong technically, went wrong.

There was feedback everywhere from the sound system, the instruments weren’t working, there were so many awkward transitions, plenty of dead air, it was the worst.

I don’t know about you, but I have this tendency to want to fix everything when things go wrong.
But you see, fixing a problem on the outside, is not going to fix a problem on the inside. Because maybe, the problem is not the things that are going wrong around me, but actually what is happening in me.

So as everything was messing up, one by one, I was getting more and more agitated.

Then, I did what I was not supposed to do: I tried to control the situation.

That Sunday, I was playing the drums. But I overstepped and started giving commands to everyone. I was starting to bark at people, telling them what to do, even if that was not my job.

I was clashing with what the director wanted to happen, and what I wanted to happen.

I’m telling this to you because I want to help you:

Sometimes, we’re the drummer, but we want to be the director.

Sometimes, things are not going our way, and so we force our way instead of the way God wants us to go.

But HE is the Director of all things! The moment we stray from His direction, things are going to fall apart.

Just like last Sunday. I had good intentions, yes, but despite how much I wanted to fix things, I could not fix things. Why? Because God wasn’t asking me to fix things, He was asking me to be faithful.

And so, I was stepping out of my blessing.

You see, when God calls you to lead, He blesses you. But the moment you walk a different direction, then God’s blessing is not going to be with you. You’re walking away from God’s blessing.

Some people tell me, “I feel so spiritually dry, I feel like God’s hand is not in my life.” Well maybe, that’s because you are choosing to stay away from where God’s hand is pulling you towards.

It’s not that He’s not blessing you, you’re just not where His blessing is.

In hindsight, if only I did my part, if only I did what God was asking me to do right then, then maybe I would get what He was trying to tell me.

In the years of my service for Him, I have learned this:

God is more concerned with your character than your craft.

God is more concerned about YOU, than He is concerned about what you do.

Look at the twelve apostles. God did not choose them because they had masters in theology or spent their whole lives studying the Scriptures. In fact, He chose fishermen, a tax collector, a political activist, among others. Jesus did not chose them not because of what did they have done in their life, but whether or not they were going to make their lives about what God was going to ask them to do.

Are you ready to do what God’s asking you to do? Even if it means trusting Him?

Last Sunday was a tough reminder for me. I know in the process, because I wanted to direct and not drum, I didn’t just fail. I hurt people. I said mean things and I let my temper and impatience get a hold of me. I had to apologise to those people for what I did.

When I think about what happened, I think of King David and King Saul.

You see, King David was a young shepherd boy, who God called to be a King.

And the current king, King Saul, did not want that.

When things were going wrong, he didn’t like how David could fix things, and he couldn’t.

God’s blessing was on David. That didn’t mean that God wasn’t blessing Saul. God was changing the form of how He was going to bless Saul.

But Saul refused to see that. He was stepping out of His blessing.

When he could have been a teacher, a father figure, someone who could have helped David be a better king one day, He chose to make David his most wanted enemy.

He chose, to direct, what God was already directing.

I want you to know that God didn’t love Saul any less . . . in fact, He wanted to show Saul that He loved Saul more than He loved him as a King. That Saul was God’s child before anything else. And so God was taking away Saul’s title, so that He could experienced God’s truth.

But sometimes, we miss that. And we want the title. Saul wanted the title.

Anyway the story goes, Saul was at His house, and David was at that time still serving Him.

1 Samuel 10 says,

10 And it happened on the next day that the distressing spirit from God came upon Saul, and he prophesied inside the house. So David played music with his hand, as at other times; but there was a spear in Saul’s hand. 11 And Saul cast the spear, for he said, “I will pin David to the wall!” But David escaped his presence twice.

I want you to see this:

David had his hand on the harp. And Saul had his hand on a spear. In Saul’s house. Saul was sitting and holding a spear in his house. That’s just creepy.

Saul was trying to control the situation.

And when he was realising that God was giving new direction into Saul’s life, Saul freaked.

And Saul threw his spear at David.

Saul was trying to fix the problem, when the problem was not the things that were happening around him, but actually what was happening in him.

This message is so real for me right now. Because sometimes, I’m like Saul. And I try to fix the problem, with a spear. When it can only be fixed with a harp.

You see, instead of complaining about what God is removing in our lives, we need to change our perspective. Because God isn’t removing, He’s revealing something greater that you can’t see with the current state you are in.

God is directing your life so that you can truly experience His love.

And that’s what I mean when I say that He is more interested in who you are, rather than what you do.

Because last Sunday, God wasn’t so much interested at how good the service was going to be, but whether or not I could serve Him in all humility.

Instead of holding a spear trying to control the situation, we need to hold a harp, and praise God for each and every situation.

That Sunday, God wanted to show me something important.

We often say in church, that if only one person in the room is blessed, then that’s great.

And so I was operating on that idea, that *I* had to bless the people in that room. Why? Because of my insecurity. I thought that if I messed up, I was responsible for it all. That people wouldn’t like me anymore if I didn’t do a great job.

But God wanted to tell me that He likes me even if I don’t do a great job. He likes me no matter what. His love for me doesn’t differ when I don’t do great, it’s whether or not I allow His love to enter my life.

So maybe, just maybe, on that Sunday, August 6, 2017— God wanted a specific person in that room to be blessed, me.

God wants to bless you. So please, drop the spear, and let Him.


One thought on “Drop The Spear

  • Yoooo bene this was beautiful! Thank you so much for helping me realize things. I’m having anxiety right now and i’m very confused but this really helped! Thank you so much😌Keep it up! (Also i love how humble enough you were to share this story) God bless. ❤️

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